Raising Manly Sons

This world is in a constant campaign to make it men less and less manly. And no wonder; the manly man is a conqueror and will not tolerate Satan's advancement in his areas of leadership. Satan wants men who are to sissy to stand against him. Christians have slacked duty to raise man men. Too many Christian men are run by their wives or by the women of the church. Too many men have rolled over and allowed women to usurp authority over them. It's time for Christian families to raise their sons to be manly men. 


Some suggestions:
1. Get them outside
Let them breathe the air and pretend to do battle with great enemies. Don't take away their toy guns and knives but teach them to use them responsibly. Graduate them to the real thing early.
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2. Let them get hurt
Bumps and bruises and scars are a part of manly process. Moms can be over protective. Let them bleed a little and don't coddle them when they do.

3. Show them your battle wounds
They don't have to be real scars. Tell them stories of your own adventures.

4. Get them around men
Boys should be around their dads a lot. They need to see dad working, sweating and "swinging a sword" so to speak. Boys should be around men who work hard and are glad to do it. When my oldest son was just nine or ten years old he walked up to one of the most well known pastors in our country, held out his hand to shake the preacher's and introduced himself. That preacher turned to me shocked and impressed. My son had grown up around preachers and was not intimidated by them. Boys should respect men, not be afraid of them.

5. Pray for them and encourage them in their own battles
Even the toughest soldier needs encouragement and some time for healing now and then. Pray with and for your sons. Encourage them when they have to endure a battle. Relieve them if you can; but don't fight their fight for them, don't protect them to much from their battle and for sure don't baby them while they develop their manly skills.

There is a balance between tough and tender. Real men are thoughtful and studious as well as tough and courageous. Just don't steal their manliness in your desire to make them your sweethearts.

Training Your Children to Be Content

Giving your children the right things early will help them be content in their lives
1. Give the time
2. Give them skill
3. Give them laughter
4. Give them Chris
5. Give them family

Leaving a Spiritual Legacy

Here is a link to an article worth considering.

http://www.growthtrac.com/artman/publish/title-ways-to-leave-a-spiritual-legacy-for-your--747.php

Teach What They Should Do Instead of What They Shouldn't

1. Teach your children that life is about God

2. Teach your children that loving others comes from loving God

3. Teach your children that it is more blessed to give than to receive

4. Teach your children that true joy awaits us in heaven (rather than merely seeking quick fun here)

5. Teach your children the character of mercy, forgiveness, courage, humility and faithfulness

Correction

1. Forgive your children's error.
2. Apologize to your children for your error
3. Refuse to discipline in anger
4. Use soft tones rather than loud when correcting your children
5. Be consistent with both discipline and love.

Establishing Family Traditions

When my children were very young I read an article that suggested making memories as a family, establishing some traditions that we would carry on year after year. I spoke to my wife about the idea and she suggested we include a tradition her parents had had during her childhood, of visiting and decorating family graves on Memorial Day. We began going with her parents each Memorial Day and my children don't remember one they have missed. We even made special arrangements to visit those graves (in Oregon) while we lived in Southern California and Oklahoma. Anita's parents are both gone now but this tradition (along with some others) have continued.

1. Plan some (nearly) unbreakable family activities

I think the reason the Memorial Day tradition stuck is because my in-laws would have visited those graves with or without us. Knowing they were going made it that much easier to settle that we were going.

2. Have some fun with family traditions

We chose early to incorporate some children's activities in Memorial Day. It is a long day with lots of driving so we planned for breaks throughout the day and a big finish just for the kids.

3. Use traditions to teach manners and etiquette

My wife has always been big on a fully set table. Breakfast lunch and dinner were always at the table and always with the dishes and silverware in their proper places.

4. Some traditions may not even be recognized

When my oldest son began courting his wife to be, her parents asked him what some of our family traditions were. We have tons of them but he had never thought of them as traditions. 

5. Allow some flexibility as the children move into adulthood

Memorial day has changed a lot over the years. We no longer go to all of the graves we did when my in-laws were alive but we now go to their graves as well as some of the others. We have had to rent larger and larger vehicles to accommodate my growing family (grandchildren now come with us on our trip). Some parts of the tradition have had to change as places we used to gather during the day are no longer open. We see some further tweaks we will need to make to honor the tradition without becoming burdened by it. Still, we all agree we want to continue with the tradition in a newer format.

With Your Kids

1. Do projects with your kids
2. Provide adventures with your kids
3. Love the Lord with your kids
4. Give your kids to the Lord
5. Learn a skill with your kids